Shock Motoring News: General Motors make crap cars no-one wants to buy!
A long, long time ago in a place far, far away.......*
The first car I owned was a 1971 Chevrolet Impala. It was a two door, in a lime green that was matt after years of polishing by previous owners. I loved it so much I made a recording of the engine rumble and mailed it back to friends in the UK. I had bought it for a girlfriend, I was only interested in motorcycles but I worked night shift, she worked day shift and taking her to and from work on my Honda was only leaving me 3 hours sleep in the afternoon. To cut a long story short, she left me and the car for a job in San Francisco (mad I know), so I took my Californian driving test and my first steps into the land of 4 wheels. It was handy really, a short time later a woman driving a pick-up without paying attention and without paying her insurance, pulled out in front of me. My femur shattered and I watched my right thigh form a ninety degree bend about halfway between my hip and my knee as I flew over the hood of her truck and tumbled into the on-coming traffic lane. My bike didn't survive the accident so for the first time a car replaced a motorcycle as my primary mode of transport, although they haven't always been that way since.

The North American motor industry, at one time the engine of the US economy is in meltdown. General Motors have announced huge redundancy plans and the closure of plants in response to a profits warning that has seen the share price fall to the lowest point in 20 years. My job as most of you know sees me splitting my time between Costa Rica and Canada. While up here in the North I rent whatever bloatmobile is available from Budget. So far the score is 3-1 to abject failure with the only goal for interest being a Chrysler 300C. My current ride is a Buick Allure. To drive it is much like sitting on a blancmange strapped to a supermarket trolley with one wheel missing. The interior is an ocean of cheap, hard, grey, plastic with plastic wood veneer printed highlights. The first L in ALLURE of the chromed plastic lettering stuck on the trunk so that passers by know what car not to buy next, has fallen off as the 2c piece of sticky tape gave up trying to hold on to it. So I am now driving A LURE, a lure for what is in question. Chevrolet engineers appear to have dispensed with damping in the suspension design and one could almost get seasick driving it. Unsurprisingly the new GM cars are being sold at 10-20% below the sticker price, with the Impala being an inexplicable exception. A leaf through their 'exciting new models' reveals all that needs to be said.


A few years ago, the US motor companies demanded that if the Japanese wanted access to US markets then they ought to build their cars their. The result: Honda Civic Motortrend 2006 Car of the Year, Honda Ridgeline Motortrend 2006 Truck of the Year, Nissan XTerra Motortrend 2006 SUV of the Year and nowadays these are North American cars built with North American labour, so no-one can say that buying a Honda is costing American jobs.

The only cars that the US car manufacturers seem to do well are muscle cars, the Dodge Charger and Ford Mustang being prime examples and trucks, Chevy are behind the others here as well. So if the US motor industry wants to start making cars people want to buy it should. Sort out build quality, realise that if BMW can make a serious car with a 3L diesel engine, then a 4L, 5L or 6L petrol engine isn't necessary, spend more than $10 on the interior, learn about suspension, you shouldn't have to spend $70K to get a car that doesn't roll like a rowing boat in a Tsunami, learn that biggest isn't always best.

European cars are for the most part too expensive for the North American market, but the Japanese have cracked it, the Koreans are doing well and the first Chinese cars should be hitting the US in a few months. It seems a shame that after all these years, the US motor industry is going to die, killed off by the consumers' understandable desire for quality and value when all it would take is a little common sense.

Jase recommendations for US marque car purchase:

• Family man or pimp - Chrysler 300C
• Exceedingly rich car nut - Ford GT
• Rap star or drug dealer - Hummer H2 (what else)
• Survivalist - Hummer H1
• Self obsessed body builder, worried about hair loss or genitalia - Dodge Viper
• Recently divorced 40s (Man) - Dodge Charger or Ford Mustang
• Recently divorced 40s (Man or Woman) - Ford Thunderbird
• Hairdresser - Chrysler PT Cruiser
• Hairdresser with family or blind person - Chevy HHR
• Teenager with acne and rich dad - Chevy SSR
• Construction worker - Ford F150 or Dodge RAM
• Overweight, fat or obese - bicycle

*Historical note: I moved to San Diego from London when I was 20 years old and returned to London some 3 years later.